THE SENSORY MADE SIMPLE PODCAST
with Dr. Samantha Goldman
Ep. 67. My Child Hardly Eats Anything

"Somewhere along the way, you've probably been told that all kids are picky, but many of the parents I've worked with feel like it's more than just pickiness."
Ep. 67. My Child Hardly Eats Anything
The Sensory Made Simple Podcast
with Dr. Samantha Goldman
Highlights from this episode:
🎙️ Are all kids picky & when should I be concerned?
🎙️ Will it always be this way?
🎙️ My child just refuses when I try to introduce new foods
Links mentioned in this episode & references:
Sam's Instagram
SOS Approach to Feeding
Dabbldoo (Affiliate Link)
https://sosapproachtofeeding.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/2019-Prevalence-Research-Slides-Summary-.pdf
https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s40519-014-0154-z
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5498871/
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0195666318303325
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4037818/
About the Host:
Being a parent of a child with sensory challenges isn’t easy. Some days, it feels like you’re walking on eggshells, unsure of what will set off the next meltdown. You’re doing everything you can, but you can’t help wondering if there’s more you could do—or if you’re missing something important.
I’m Sam Goldman, a pediatric occupational therapist and your guide in this sensory journey. I’ve spent over a decade helping parents like you understand their child’s sensory needs and find real-life strategies that actually work. My goal? To help you feel less overwhelmed, more confident, and ready to support your child in a way that feels manageable for your family.
You’re already an amazing parent, and you know your child better than anyone. This podcast is here to give you the tools to make life just a little easier—for both of you.
Social Media Links:
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Disclaimers
Just so you know, this is based on my personal experience, opinions, and research I’ve done as a pediatric occupational therapist. None of the below is medical, occupational therapy, or feeding therapy advice. When you buy through links on this page, we may earn a commission. Learn more about affiliate links
Disclaimers: The information provided by SAMANTHA N. GOLDMAN, LLC (“we,” “us” or “our”) on http://drsamgoldman.com , and http://samantha-goldman.mykajabi.com (the “Site”) is for general informational purposes only. The Site cannot and does not contain medical advice. Any medical information is provided as my/our personal experiences is not a substitute for professional advice. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical advice.THE USE OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THIS SITE IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK. Although this blog/podcast contains external links WE DO NOT WARRANT, ENDORSE, GUARANTEE, OR ASSUME RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE ACCURACY OR RELIABILITY OF ANY INFORMATION OFFERED BY THIRD-PARTY WEBSITES LINKED THROUGH THE SITE OR ANY WEBSITE OR FEATURE LINKED IN ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THIS SITE IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK. ALTHOUGH THIS SITE CONTAINS EXTERNAL LINKS WE DO NOT WARRANT, ENDORSE, GUARANTEE, OR ASSUME RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE ACCURACY OR RELIABILITY OF ANY INFORMATION OFFERED BY THIRD-PARTY WEBSITES LINKED THROUGH THE SITE OR ANY WEBSITE OR FEATURE LINKED IN ANY BANNER OR OTHER ADVERTISING.
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Transcript
Hello, hello, and welcome back to the podcast.
I am really excited for today's episode.
When I was doing feeding therapy, one of the very first things most parents said to me was, my child hardly eats any foods.
I can literally count on my hand what they eat.
If this sounds like you, then this episode is going to be so helpful.
I've spent the last three weeks putting it together and making sure it delivered amazing support.
Side note, it was actually a very good show.
It's actually pretty hard for me to get this podcast out.
For those of you who are new here, I have about a 10 week old baby, and I'm still learning to adjust to being his primary caregiver and keep the business up and running.
Since he was born, it's also made me look differently at my business.
And so I've been making some big changes over the past couple of weeks.
One of those being the format of my podcast episodes and blogs.
As you'll see in this episode, I surveyed my community over on Instagram for your questions surrounding this topic.
And the focus is going to be answering those questions.
If you've got some extra time, which I know many of us don't right now, I do also recommend checking out the written format on the blog, not just the show notes, which is just a transcript of this episode, because in the blogs, I'm actually linking pictures and Instagram posts and reels that will help you out even more.
So does it feel like your child barely eats?
Can you count on one hand how many foods they eat?
Does it feel like no matter what you try, they just refuse to try anything new?
I'm here to help.
A little overview of what we'll be talking about today.
Are all kids picky?
When should I be concerned?
Will it always be this way?
I don't know where to start.
My child just refuses when I try to introduce new foods.
They used to eat everything.
What's the deal?
And how do I respond to on-bookers comments?
Let's get to it.
Are all kids picky?
Somewhere along the way, you've probably been told that all kids are picky, but many of the parents I've worked with feel like it's more than just pickiness.
Yes, that's a thing.
It's true that all kids have to learn to eat new foods.
We aren't born knowing what a zucchini is.
We learn by interacting, exploring and tasting it.
The more we practice it and have good experiences with it, the more comfortable our brain becomes eating it.
So of course, children are going to be more hesitant around new and challenging foods, like vegetables.
But no, not all kids struggle with true eating challenges.
In fact, some research has shown that only 20 to 30% of kids will struggle with an eating challenge or picky eating in the early years.
And about 50% of those continue into the later years.
When should I be concerned?
This is a difficult question.
Since I'm not a dietician or a pediatrician, I can't give you exact answers on how much a child needs or should eat.
Likely, they wouldn't be able to give you a general answer either.
Every child is different and has different nutritional needs.
If you're here on this page, it would probably be beneficial to discuss your concerns with your medical team.
If your child is losing weight or you're concerned they're not eating enough calories or experiencing any other medical issues like constipation, diarrhea, et cetera, reach out to your pediatrician ASAP.
In the feeding world, there are two levels of pediatric feeding challenges.
We call these picky eaters and problem feeders.
That's the something more.
I recommend ignoring the names on these.
Your child is amazing and perfect just as they are.
The titles mean nothing, except that it helps distinguish the severity.
I share them here because you may hear them when speaking with medical professionals.
Okay, so picky eaters.
Typically eat 30 foods or more.
Eat at least one food from each food group.
Eat at least one food from each texture.
May eat different meals than the family, but eats with them.
And tolerates new foods on the plate and they may even explore, touch, taste them at times.
On the other hand, problem feeders eat less than 20 foods, avoid entire food groups like vegetables and fruit, avoid entire groups of food textures, always eats a different meal and they don't eat with the family, and melts down completely when new foods are introduced.
If you're noticing that your child falls within either a picky eater or problem feeder range, a feeding therapy evaluation can be immensely helpful for ruling out causes and figuring out exactly how to support your personal child.
If you are dreading meal time and struggling day in and day out, it can be a total game changer to have that unbiased third party who specializes in feeding.
Also, the SOS approach to feeding has an awesome database to find feeding therapists in your area.
And I will link that in the show notes of this episode.
Will it always be this way?
The short answer is every child will progress at their own rate.
But as a parent, how we respond to our child at the table does influence their progress with food.
There is so much you can do to help a child who isn't eating a variety of foods.
So it doesn't have to stay this way.
Of course, as we mentioned before, one-to-one feeding therapy is great for working with your child.
But since you are the one feeding your child day in and day out, it's equally as important that you as the parent know and feel confident supporting your child at the table.
To do this, you need to not only understand your child's sensory and food preferences, but also how to strategically use this information to introduce and explore those new foods.
I want you to feel confident introducing new foods to your sensational eater.
If you're struggling, I highly recommend you check out my online programs for parents where I teach you everything you need to know about the sensory system and mealtime battles.
You can check that out at drsamgoldman.com forward slash store.
Again, that's drsamgoldman.com forward slash store.
I don't know where to start.
When your child is struggling with eating, it can feel so overwhelming.
You're constantly bombarded with unsolicited advice, unhelpful comments and tons of information online.
How do you even know where to start?
One of the easiest ways to get started is just to add a bit of variety to your child's diet by introducing foods that are similar to ones they already know and love.
Children who struggle with food variety often prefer to food jack.
Food jacking is when a child eats the same exact thing the same exact way every single day.
This is because it's predictable and they know they like it.
For example, eating peanut butter and jelly, same peanut butter, same jelly, the same exact way cut exactly the same exact way.
But unfortunately, as humans, we tend to get bored of eating the same thing every day and it can lead to burning out and dropping of foods in the long run.
Adding subtle variety can help keep it interesting for the brain.
For example, say your child loves Cheerios.
What other O-shaped cereals can you try?
You could try another brand of O cereal or you could try different flavors of Cheerios, like strawberry or honey nut, or maybe they eat peanut butter and jelly every day.
But you start to explore that different type of jelly.
How about a different bread?
And you cut it a different way.
An important tip here, whenever we change a food, it is no longer considered a safe food.
I'm gonna say that again.
Whenever we change a food, so if we try a new jelly, we cut it a different way.
Anything different, it is no longer considered a safe food.
It immediately becomes a new food and is very, very hard for a child most of the time.
So a helpful strategy can be to include a different safe food.
Your child will predictably eat on the side to decrease the pressure.
And so they know and feel confident that they have something to eat.
My child just refuses when I try new foods.
You may be sitting here thinking, yeah, I tried that, it didn't work.
My first question for you is how many times did you try it?
I almost never expect a child who struggles to eat, to enjoy, or even to try a food the first time I offer it.
Remember, this is challenging for them.
It will likely take a lot of practice and reintroductions for them to feel comfortable enough to try or enjoy a food.
For some kids, you may only need to introduce a food once.
For others, they may need to see a food 50 times before they're ready and 50 more times before they actually enjoy it.
Research shows that in general, parents offer a food three to five times before giving up on it.
But if your child is only introduced to a food three to five times, how are they ever gonna learn to eat it?
Don't give up.
Continue to introduce it in new and fun ways.
One of my favorite super easy ways to make introducing new foods fun is with the adorable Dabbldoo food picks.
You can actually get 10% off on their website with my code DrSamGoldman.
And they are just so cute.
They have the cutest names.
They're made by a pediatric dietician and she made them super sturdy, which I love because I always worried about those small ones and the ones that break off easily.
These ones aren't as sharp.
They're much dirtier and they are just so, so cute.
So go check those out.
That is Dabbldoo, D-A-B-B-L-D-O-O.
And again, you can get 10% off with my code DrSamGoldman.
And of course, I do need to tell you here that is an affiliate code.
So if you make a purchase, I may get a commission on it.
My child used to eat everything.
What's the deal?
When he, she was a baby, he, she ate everything.
Sound familiar?
You are definitely not alone in this.
Here's a couple of reasons this can happen.
Number one, natural development.
As children age, they begin to have more opinions about food.
They're exposed to lots of new options and can decipher which ones they like the most.
As children age, we also expect them to eat harder foods.
With babies, we offer foods in easier to consume ways, like purees or super soft foods, since their oral motor skills haven't fully developed.
As kids get older, we begin to offer harder foods, but their oral motor skills might still be developing or their sensory system might have a hard time handling this change.
Number three, pressure.
When our children are babies, they are getting a lot of their nutrition from formula or breast milk.
When we introduce foods, we do it in a very gentle way for exposure and play.
We usually make this a lot of fun and very positive for them.
As kids age and the formula or the milk phases out, we as parents tend to get very anxious about how much nutrition our child is getting.
So we expect them to perform a certain way at meals and maybe placing excess pressure on them that actually drives them to eat more, or excuse me, to eat less, not more.
Number four, past experiences.
Every experience we have with the food is stored in our brain, whether we logically remember it or not.
This informs how we interact with food in the future.
If your child has a negative experience with a certain food, they may be more likely to refuse it in the future.
And number five, medical issues.
Some children develop GI concerns, allergies, et cetera, as they age.
Make sure to chat with your medical team to rule out any possible causes.
How do I respond to onlookers' comments?
When your child struggles to eat, you become the recipient of oh so many unsolicited, unwarranted, and honestly quite unhelpful comments, like, they'll eat when they're hungry.
You're the parent, you tell them what to do.
You just need to discipline them more.
When you were a child, I...
The truth is, it's extremely easy to judge someone's situation from the outside.
Most of the time, the people who are saying these comments have never raised or worked with a child with feeding challenges.
Although some techniques may have worked for them, that doesn't mean they're gonna work for your child.
So the first step is to realize they have never walked in your shoes, and that no one understands your child like you do.
Everyone has a different comfort level when it comes to responding to friends and family members.
Something that can be helpful is to realize that most of the time, the intent behind these comments is to be helpful, even when it isn't.
They're trying to offer some kind of suggestion because they can see you and your child are struggling and they just want to help.
But you have a couple of options if you prefer to avoid the commentary.
Number one, simply smile and acknowledge it.
Just because they offer it, doesn't mean you need to do it.
You can smile and say something like, I'm glad that worked for you, and then just move on with the conversation.
Number two, thank them for the advice, but be confident in your plan.
Again, you know your child best.
I most often find myself saying something like, thank you so much, but I actually, whatever I actually think, and I feel really good with that plan.
You don't owe anyone an explanation.
However, I personally find that when you are confident in your plan and of course doing your research and working with a provider who can help you identify your child's personal needs, people are less likely to continue the conversation.
And number three, be direct and steer away from the conversation.
If you are not comfortable talking about your child's eating habits, it's okay to be direct about that.
You can say something like, thank you so much for the support, we're working on it.
But I am not comfortable speaking about it, especially in front of him or her.
So tell me about and change the subject.
Setting boundaries is hard, but it also lets you enjoy your time with your friends and loved ones.
Again, most of the time, they are just trying to be helpful.
If eating is a continued struggle, I'm here for you.
My online parent courses are designed to help you not only understand what's going on inside your child's body when it comes to the sensory system, but also how to use this information to better support them at the table.
Again, you can check all of that out at www.drsamgoldman.com forward slash store.
And that brings us to the end of our episode.
I would absolutely love to know if you liked this format of our podcast better answering questions, if you did, and even if you didn't, I want to know.
Go over to Instagram and send me a DM at DrSamGoldman.
I really do listen to all of your comments and I change everything based on what supports you best.
So again, come over to Instagram at DrSamGoldman and send me a message so I know what you thought.